Humiliation: An Element of Faith

This week has definitely been a test in faith and patience. I woke up anxious almost every morning wondering how/when God was going to work things out. Ever time I felt anxious, I confessed it to God, and my accountability partner, and turned it over to God in prayer. This week I have a new respect for the term 'surrender'.

One of the lessons I am learning is to contact the bill collectors and let them know what's going on. By making contact and trusting God for the outcome, I was able to work out new arrangements. Making these contacts is very humbling. So far the reps have been kind, and even understanding, but having to admit that I don't even know when I will be able to pay my debts is difficult.

I am looking for ways to get back to work to generate more income, but I haven't found anything yet.

It's such a juggling act "robbing Peter to pay Paul", and I'm ready to break free from this. I can't wait for the financial class to start next Wednesday.

Not to My Own Understanding

Today is Resurrection Sunday. All day I have heard messages that if Jesus can be resurrected from the dead, then He can surely resurrect my financial situation. I have to trust Him although I can't see any way how it can happen.

By April 30th, I expect to have the car note and the cell phone bill come due. Since I took deferrments on both last month when the payments were too high, I need a little more than $1300 to pay both. If not paid, I expect some type of shut-off or reposession. I don't know what to do.

When I encountered similar situations like this, my own understanding would lead me to call someone to ask for help or to borrow the money if I thought I could pay it back. I don't want to do that this time, because I feel like that would be blocking the miraculous way God plans to answer my prayers. Plus, I'm SOOOO tired of asking for support. I'm ready to see something supernatural. I'm trusting God to do something BIG!

I can't wait to post what happens...

A Step Forward

Last night after blogging about waiting for God to act in my situation, I rcvd an email from a Christian finance blog I follow called One Money Design (http://www.onemoneydesign.com/). It was an overview of blogposts for the week. The last post listed was titled, "How to Avoid Ovedrawing Your Checking Account". It was a little late for the "avoiding" part, since my account was severely overdrawn (and had just rcvd another fee since I had not made a deposit) in the amount of $306!!!!!


Anyway, in my new mindset to not dwell on the problem but focus on Christ, I decided to read through the article to see what I could do differently next time. The writer suggested many ideas of which I was already aware, like:

Deposit money asap

Call customer service to have fees removed

Be nice and take responsibility

Don't give up. Be persistent and ask for additional help until you get what you need.

Well the first idea wasn't an option since there was no money to deposit that would cover the shortfall. So I took #2, and contacted customer service via online chat since it was Saturday. (Every cell in my body told me this wasn't going to make any difference because it was my fault the account overdrew in the first place.)

The rep I spoke with was nice and helpful but could only refund $35.00. I was grateful, but not satisfied, so I decided to try and speak with someone else. I asked for a number to call for more help and the explained the entire situation to the next rep including Craig's illness. I was shocked and overjoyed when she said she would make an exception to their "one fee refunded per cycle" rule, and refund ALL the fees which totalled $175.00!!!!!!

Thank You God for Your favor and faithfulness, and for giving me the courage to do what, in my mind, didn't make sense!

Waiting

Waiting for the Sun by Mitchell Miller

Waiting is the hardest part.

You know it's temporary. You know God can and will fix it.

You just don't know how...and you don't know when.

And you may not know... until the sudden change comes.

So you wait patiently, reshifting your focus on Christ whenever the anxiousness tries to creep up.

I must confess, I have not been a good steward of God's resources. I have not put enough emphasis on handling the 90%. I've sacrificed too much to the bank in fees because I failed to keep track of what was available.

Lord, I want to handle Your money faithfully. I desire to get Your input on how to distribute it. Right now, there are close to $2000 in bills coming up that I have no idea how to pay. Show me Lord the path to take. Wrap Your arms around me as I wait for You to reveal Your work. I am totally dependent on You to free me from this financial pit I have allowed myself to fall into. Whatever You tell me to do, I will do, even when it doesn't make sense. I expect to come out of this victoriously! Help me to focus on that victory despite the distractions and obstacles that may come. Father, I praise You now for what You're going to do! I can't wait to share my testimony about how You brought me out, and rescued me from the pit. Amen.

What I Learned Today

Seeing my income and expenses on paper, in detail, was a little painful. I did learn a great deal about where I am and what I need to do to change (my part).

The biggest eye-opener was seeing that based on my income and the expenses I have right now, my household is carrying a $1071 deficit every month! No wonder I'm stressing!

What this tells me immediately is that I need to increase my income and look into cutting expenses.

By doing this execise, I was able to determine how much I would need to earn when I go back to work. I need a job that pays at least $516/week net, which is about $27,000 for me to start. Knowing this, I was able to find two entry-level jobs on Craigslist that I believe fit my skills. I applied to both tonight (one is part-time, but can lead to full-time). They are both close to home, which is important until I feel better about leaving Craig alone.

It's freeing already just knowing where I stand. Thank You God for giving the ability to get wealth using the skills You gave me. Thank You for renewing my hope. I will continue to lean on You for my prosperity. I love You, Lord. Amen

Estimated Budget

Monthly Income..........................................................$2413

SSDI..............................$1137

Unemployment...........$780 (through June 9, 2011)

Child Support..............$496

Food Stamps...............$213

Less

1. Tithe.............$242

NET SPENDABLE INCOME.......................................$2384

Monthly Living Expenses

Housing.........................................$1616.31

Rent...........................$1200

Electricity/gas..........$75

Water.........................$50

Sewer/sanitation......$26

Cell phones................$194

Cable..........................$38.79

Internet.....................$32.52

Food...............................................$303

Groceries......................$213

Takeout........................$50

Lunch (Dom)...............$40

Transportation.................................$767.73

Payments..............$519.53

Gas.........................$80

Insurance..............$99

License/Taxes......$9

Maintenance.........$60

Insurance..........................................$105

Life.......................$105

Debts.................................................$75+

School loan...............$25

Drexel debt..............$25

Other debt...............$25

Entertainment/Recreation...............$35.75

Netflix................................$10.75

Pets....................................$20

Dues for Creative arts.....$5

School Activities...............$15

Clothing................................................$75

Savings.................................................$277.50

Medical Expenses...............................$20

Miscellaneous.......................................$180

Toiletries/cosmetics..............$60

Beauty....................................$80

Laundry.................................$20

Subscriptions.........................$20

Total Living Expenses.................................................................$3455.29

Income vs. Living Expenses

Net Spendable Income.................................................$2384

Less Total Living Expenses.........................................$3455.29

Deficit.............................................................................-$1071.29

Now I know!

It Starts with the Truth

I am FED UP with my finances!

I am a Child of the King, but I live like a pauper's kid.
If anybody looked at my checking account, they would think I didn't know anything about managing money...but I do!

It's time to stop surviving, and start living in financial freedom!

It starts with the TRUTH!

1. Our credit is a mess! I ordered the free annual reports today from all 3 reporting bureaus. I had to order by phone due to some security breach, so I should have them in about 15 days. I'm expecting them to be pretty low, but there is nowhere to go but UP!


2. Our household annual income went from $90,000 to $26,000 for a family of 5 in 2 years due to job loss and disability caused by a stroke my 48 year old husband suffered almost a year and a half ago. I left my job to care for him full-time, but know I need to return the workplace asap.


3. Our rent and car note payments are based on what we made 4 years ago. I need to find a way to lower these, and other, expenses.


4. We have 3 daughters who are all college-bound in the next 3 to 8 years and there is no savings to help with the costs.


5. Unexpected expenses, especially forthe girls, set me back regularly. I get child-support, but it's not enough to cover their expenses. Extra help from their biological dad is inconsistent.


6. I have to go back to work, but I'm nervous about leaving Craig by himself. He doesn't qualify for a paid home health aide, he's "doing too well by himself".


7. I've recently recommitted to tithing, and have found success using Paypal to tithe as soon as I get income.

With God as my help, and using the resources He provides (FACC sermons and workshops, "Lee Jenkins on Money", Crown Financial Ministries, etc.), I will find deliverance from this financial pit.